I’ve held off doing this post for ages because I really wanted to think about what I want to say. First off, Michelle Mone – she’s completely a hero of mine. I love what she has accomplished, I love the back story to her Ultimo bra business and I love the way she conducts herself in public – all in all it leads to a woman who is smart, savvy and a proper grafter. All things that I admire in other women. 

So, I had a look at the UTan range when it launched – it’s great.. nothing to complain about there at all. However, sometime later when USculpt Boobs launched, I felt disappointed. It’s a stretch for me to believe that even a cellulite cream can make much of a difference, never mind a cream to decrease the size of your boobs. I have only ever seen a handful of products that make an inroad into cellulite and even then, it’s pretty much a surface difference; there just isn’t a cream that will genuinely, long term reduce those fatty deposits and transform your legs and bottom into that of Elle McPherson’s. It is never going to happen. 

And, it is the same with USculpt Boobs Minus and Boobs Plus. There’s a message, right there, that if your boobs aren’t too small, then they must be too big. If anyone knows about boobs, it has to be Michelle Mone, but in spite of magazines and The Daily Mail reviews extolling the virtues of this misery-reducing miracle, it quite honestly cannot be true to any degree worth noticing. I remember Rodial’s claims over a similar product – to go up half a cup size or something. Why bother? Seriously, why would you? I don’t care what technology has gone into a cream that claims to reduce your breast size and actually whether it does or doesn’t work is immaterial really. It’s the message that you could somehow be better – in either direction that bothers me. If you have the world’s smallest breasts, then rubbing cream on them won’t make any difference, and if you have the world’s largest breasts, there isn’t anything, bar surgery, that can make them less cumbersome, painful and impossible to dress. No cream at all can do that. Again, it is surgery that is the only answer (or, of course, huge weight loss, depending on how much is fat and how much is breast tissue). 

USculpt isn’t even about perfecting – it’s about changing – and it’s not really a message that I think anyone should be passing on to women. You don’t have to be half a cup size bigger or smaller to be better. Yet despite that, the creams sold out. They’re restocked now, but it’s this constant chipping away of confidence that is one aspect of the beauty industry that I really don’t like. I mean, sold out? What does that tell you? That a very significant number of women felt their lives would be better with an infinitessimal reduction or increase in breast size (if any). What, really? 

Michelle, my friend, rub that cream on your head and see if you can increase the part that celebrates women just how they are and decrease the part that helps women feel less perfect than they already do, hey?

Transparency Disclosure

All products are sent to me as samples from brands and agencies unless otherwise stated. Affiliate links may be used. Posts are not affiliate driven.