USculpt Boobs Minus

I’ve held off doing this post for ages because I really wanted to think about what I want to say. First off, Michelle Mone – she’s completely a hero of mine. I love what she has accomplished, I love the back story to her Ultimo bra business and I love the way she conducts herself in public – all in all it leads to a woman who is smart, savvy and a proper grafter. All things that I admire in other women. 

So, I had a look at the UTan range when it launched – it’s great.. nothing to complain about there at all. However, sometime later when USculpt Boobs launched, I felt disappointed. It’s a stretch for me to believe that even a cellulite cream can make much of a difference, never mind a cream to decrease the size of your boobs. I have only ever seen a handful of products that make an inroad into cellulite and even then, it’s pretty much a surface difference; there just isn’t a cream that will genuinely, long term reduce those fatty deposits and transform your legs and bottom into that of Elle McPherson’s. It is never going to happen. 

And, it is the same with USculpt Boobs Minus and Boobs Plus. There’s a message, right there, that if your boobs aren’t too small, then they must be too big. If anyone knows about boobs, it has to be Michelle Mone, but in spite of magazines and The Daily Mail reviews extolling the virtues of this misery-reducing miracle, it quite honestly cannot be true to any degree worth noticing. I remember Rodial’s claims over a similar product – to go up half a cup size or something. Why bother? Seriously, why would you? I don’t care what technology has gone into a cream that claims to reduce your breast size and actually whether it does or doesn’t work is immaterial really. It’s the message that you could somehow be better – in either direction that bothers me. If you have the world’s smallest breasts, then rubbing cream on them won’t make any difference, and if you have the world’s largest breasts, there isn’t anything, bar surgery, that can make them less cumbersome, painful and impossible to dress. No cream at all can do that. Again, it is surgery that is the only answer (or, of course, huge weight loss, depending on how much is fat and how much is breast tissue). 

USculpt isn’t even about perfecting – it’s about changing – and it’s not really a message that I think anyone should be passing on to women. You don’t have to be half a cup size bigger or smaller to be better. Yet despite that, the creams sold out. They’re restocked now, but it’s this constant chipping away of confidence that is one aspect of the beauty industry that I really don’t like. I mean, sold out? What does that tell you? That a very significant number of women felt their lives would be better with an infinitessimal reduction or increase in breast size (if any). What, really? 

Michelle, my friend, rub that cream on your head and see if you can increase the part that celebrates women just how they are and decrease the part that helps women feel less perfect than they already do, hey?


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10 responses to “USculpt Boobs Minus”

  1. That’s just so depressing; I don’t understand why we can’t just love and work with what we’ve got when it comes to our figure. Surely the joy of boobs is that they come in all shapes and sizes?! xx

  2. Charli

    I agree with all you wrote here! Whenever I see boob products it sort of always screams ‘false’ at me… and cellulite creams.. sadly!!

  3. Is nobody going to make the ‘manboobs’ comment??

  4. Meg

    It’s not such a joy when you’re weighed down by back pain and stretched skin!

    I think the inference from the products is not that boobs are all either too big or small, it’s perhaps that if you’re boobs are just right for you then don’t buy a cream at all. It’s not like the female population must choose one UTan product or another…we could just not buy any if we’re quite happy.

  5. Sparklz and Shine

    Any reply I try to type to this just makes me crosser. The whole concept is just ridiculous and selling pipe dreams. Grrr

  6. I’m in the category of people who wishes that this would work. FF boobs are not fun. But I do recognise the fact that all a cream could do would be to temporarily tighten things and that solves nothing. It just makes people feel worse when it doesn’t give the magic hoped for results and that just causes even more internal pain and breeds more creams like this and so the cycle goes on.
    I feel very sad that women, and I do include myself, do dislike their bodies to thé extent that we will spend silly amounts of money on them, on creams and lotions and potions and injections and surgery to correct what we see as flaws. What we need is for all of us to accept who we are, regardless of the size of our boobs, thighs, nose, pores… I just don’t know how to achieve that but I do know that a boob minimising cream is not the answer 🙁

  7. valerie @wildbeginnings

    fantastically well said!

  8. If this worked wouldn’t people just be smearing it on their butts and thighs to “Minus” those too? Such nonsense with no scientific basis whatsoever that I struggle to believe in the manufacturers believe. That it’s sold out does depress me because it means money is being made from purposely preying on insecurities (yes i know that pretty much applies to entire beauty and skin industries!)

  9. beauty-laser

    Well said! If only women would listen to sense and stop trying to look like Barbie. We are so gullible and insecure and we teach our daughters to be the same.

  10. Rachel

    Completely agree with this post. I am the proud owner of booblets (as they are miniature) and I’m thankful that I can wear cute dresses and tops without looking mumsy or bigger than my small frame, I used to hate my boobs but age has made me wise – I’ll never have to deal with sagginess. I’ll never be able to wear a knockout cleavage dress either – but you can’t have it all. I’m also sure that I would never buy into a cream that promises to make them bigger – far more exciting things to spend money on

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