Fresh & Dry Balls

Below The Belt
Below The Belt

See. I’m not even joking. Here’s the thing. Anything washy for ladyparts, I treat with a kind of scorn – I can remember a brand – French – that literally had everything you would associate with anti ageing for your face, but for your ladybits. I can’t remember its name. There were some wipes (we used to call them muff dusters) and they were huge sellers in hot countries – understandable. Anything else, and I’m just not at all convinced that ladyparts need any interfering with.

But, I also remember some dust to treat ball woomph – and click away now if you don’t want to hear the ins and outs – but it was for guys to dust their balls so that when they sat down they didn’t get, let’s say, a fragrant outburst from that area. And I totally thought that was hilarious. So, I know I’m a little bit hypocritical on this one.

Waterless Shower
Waterless Shower

Not possessing any balls, I have no clue if fresh and dry balls is sought after – I guess it would be but then, don’t have any clue if wet balls is a problem. Grooming guys, you might have to help me out here – I have no idea what’s going on in those pants!

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So, is this a good thing? I don’t even know. I’m so looking forward to the comments on this so I can have some enlightenment!

The Below The Belt site is HERE and you can have Fresh & Dry Balls for £6.95.

 

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Jane Cunningham

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22 responses to “Fresh & Dry Balls”

  1. Emma

    Well it’s definitely eye catching!

    http://thebravestindividual.blogspot.co.uk

    Reply
  2. Sara

    MUFF DUSTERS?! It’s too early in the morning for this level of comedy.

    Reply
  3. Karen (lovelygirliebits)

    This had me in the fits of giggles here at work! Ah the lads need to look after their aul balls and it’s great that there’s a product out there for said balls 😉

    Reply
  4. Stephanie

    You know my boyfriend is a chef and I seriously think he would love this haha! Most of them need to use a bit of talc here and there because of serious sweating (so gross) so not smelling like a baby might be a good thing ! As for feminine versions i tend to agree but normal soap irritates my delicate (one way to put it) skin so some of those products are great for that! but Sanex 0% is just as good and you don’t feel as weird buying it as you do with a product called ‘femfresh’ worst name ever!

    Reply
  5. Suze

    Wowser! I’m also ball-free (and therefore have limited insight) but am wondering what’s wrong with cotton undies, wet wipes and talcum powder?! I’m assuming that’d be the old-skool way of overcoming such issues inbetween proper washes – ie for festivals, camping etc.

    What’s next? A product specifically marketed to combat sweaty cleavage and/or under-boobage? Let’s face it, at times we all get a bit….(ahem)…moist and not as fresh as we’d like, in certain areas, but do we really need a purpose-made product to…er…tackle every body part separately? (no pun intended!)

    Obviously you have to be careful which products are used in the more intimate body areas but our bodies are supposed to sweat and as festival-goers and campers manage perfectly well with the odd wet-wipe here and there I don’t really see the need for these newfangled nether region products for the average person (ie without a medical condition eg hyperhidrosis).

    Reply
  6. Carrie M

    This had me giggling!
    Reminds me of Anti Monkey Butt, a brand with (mostly powder) offerings for men, women and baby – complete with pics of said monkey cheeks on label! I thought it was strange until I heard that it was the saviour product of soldiers in the likes of desert heat…. so if you know anyone deployed, this uh, ball wash might be a good in a care package 🙂

    Reply
  7. Plearn Nataricha

    This post make me laugh a lot. I will show this post to my boyfriend lol

    Kiss me Sunday // Bloglovin

    Reply
  8. Joy @ Paws and Prada

    Oh lord, I couldn’t get through this without bursting into giggles! *childish snigger*

    Reply
  9. Lydia

    There was a brand of cleansers, high end, for ladies that was released about three years ago. I can’t remember the name but I imagine they’re gone now, given that I haven’t seen them since! As for this. YES YES AND YES! The amount of men I know that have to, try not go gag, PEEL themselves apart during summer is horrid. They fiddle, they itch, they get sore. This is a great idea! I’m all for it.

    Reply
  10. konglishbeauty

    This is actually a frequent topic of discussion between me and my fella when the weather gets a bit warm so I thought I’d ask him for his opinion and this is what he said!
    “Being the proud owner of a ‘pair’, I thought I would add my tuppence to the discussion. So the question is “Are fresh & dry balls a good thing? The answer is an emphatic yes. And let’s be clear here, we are really talking about the bean-bag, not the beans! The big issue with not having a fresh & dry bean-bag is BSTL (Bean-bag Sticking to Legs). This is most often caused by every man’s nemesis, Betty Swollocks. This affliction is usually brought on by over-heating due to hot weather or the environment. Scrunched up on a long haul flight is my pet hate. However, it is also exacerbated by other factors such as choice of underwear and grooming preferences. If a fella prefers his crown jewels in a ‘hammock’ style of underwear (or budgie smugglers), then the issue is less noticeable. However, should he prefer the more free & easy boxers then BSTL is ever present. Add to this the modern trend for waxing/shaving the nether regions, then is it any wonder that your man will often be found absent-mindedly adjusting himself? Whether it is a football match or funeral, BSTL cannot be left unattended. Candidly, the relief is quite enjoyable. In fact, I am convinced this is the only reason that men really need trouser pockets! So the next time you catch him rummaging for small change deep in his jeans, you now know what he is up to. I have not had a chance to try the Below the Belt products so cannot vouch for their effectiveness in keeping the area dry, and may report back later if I do. In the meantime, I will most likely carry on enjoying the adjusting :)”

    Reply
    1. MichaelBTB

      This post has started a great chat hasn’t it! Thanks for getting the ball rolling Jane! (ahem.. pardon?). Something we find not every guy might like to try, think they need, admit they need, or want to need.. but the visit old Betty Swollocks happens! We like to think Below The Belt not only solves that problem, but also helps open up a conversation – just like here! – so guys know that there’s an option.. and that someone is listening to their needs.

      Hi KonglishBeauty and fella! If you’d like to try some, please go ahead and contact us here, Twitter @BTBgrooming or on email customer.services@btbgrooming.co.uk, we’d really love to hear your thoughts!

      Hope to speak soon and keep up the good fight for Fresh & Dry Balls!

      Reply
  11. Laura Bolton

    Jane – I have news, I actually forwarded this post onto my other half.

    This was greeted at first by WTF did I just read?

    This was then followed by a fairly honest mans POV as follows: – “Well we all get mildly sweaty, but unless you weigh like 400lbs and it’s not coming out in torrents then it shouldn’t be a problem. A bit of soap and water once or twice a day during hot weather is more than sufficient. Also throughout the course of any given day, I don’t tend to notice my balls, nor would I unless they were on fire, but that’s happened almost zero times.”

    And then rather interestingly:- “That’s advertising for you creating a false need for you to fill, while instilling fear on some level. Fear of not filling that void. Easiest way to get someone to buy something is to convince them that they need it”

    So in short, he doubts it’s something men really need and it’s simply the media creating a problem where there was none. Who knew it affects dudes as well?

    I love that my man is so honest – the comedy value of his response I found to be awesome on such a hot sticky day 🙂

    Reply
  12. Liz Randell

    1. I can’t believe this product exists! 2. I think it’s freakin’ hilarious!

    Well why not I guess, seems there’s a product for everything nowadays, so why not balls too!! Ahahaha!!

    Reply
  13. Clare

    Betty swollacks – apparently as Konglishbeauty’s partner says can be an issue. My husband agrees. He is a PE teacher. Do I need to say any more?!? Maybe also it would prevent the old ‘pocket billiards’ – sorry but used to have a boss that was always adjusting himself. Sorry to be rude Jane but there it is!

    What I want to see now is a few TV adverts and that would make such a refreshing change from us ladies being bombarded with wings, protection, freshness, etc…..! That would be hilarious!

    Reply
  14. Rachel

    Is it April 1st?!
    Also, so disappointed this is not named Betty Swollocks! (How very immature of me!)
    I reckon it is probably a good idea though.

    Reply
  15. Joan

    Apparently policemen and blokes wearing protective clothing stab vests etc are succeptable to sweaty balls which can result in the equivent to thrush.

    Reply
  16. Ali

    Thanks to your readers, I have learned more about male genital hygiene than I ever wanted to know. As for the actual products, I think its great. Share the paranoia. Why should women have exclusive rights to being made to feel inadequate on every possible front! Well done BTB Grooming!

    Reply
  17. Stephanie

    Whatever the outcome of the ball investigation, I think the marketing on this is hilarious! My boyfriend would love it!

    Stephanie
    http://missstephanieusher.blogspot.co.uk/
    http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/3436251
    xxxx

    Reply
  18. Sam

    I’m crying… this is amazing! I am not telling my other half… any excuse not to shower… no chance!
    I am thinking of getting it someone as a joke for christmas…
    Love it, just may give men the wrong id ea and think they can get away without showering for longer

    Reply
  19. Michelle

    Hi Sam! Fear not! The Fresh & Dry Balls product is designed for AFTER he’s showered, to keep fresh for longer. (just don’t let on about the Waterless shower) 😉

    Michelle @ Team BTB

    Reply
  20. Pink Provocateur

    In the movie “Chef”, they use cornstarch. {{{ shrug }}}
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2883512/

    Reply
  21. Sabrina

    This is hilarious. As I am a woman, I can’t vouch for its effectiveness, but considering the amount of products out there for lady bits, it’s funny to see that someone has invented a male equivalent.

    Reply

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