Em Ford’s You Look Disgusting Video

I watched Em Ford’s incredible You Look Disgusting video last Wednesday at 343 views and knew then that it was heading for viral. When she popped up on this morning’s BBC news with a prominent dermatologist, I found myself listening to every single word she said, and not listening to the dermatologist, who had very little to offer for those suffering from acne.

 

 

 

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If you haven’t seen the You Look Disgusting video, it’s here and very well worth a watch. It deals with three things. The emotional effects of acne, the physical effects of acne and the devastation that can be caused by on-line commentary.

You can’t be on-line and not know about trolls (which is rather too gentle a word) – people who feel they have the right to insult and offend. You put yourself out there, so you’re fair game, right?

Em’s video is powerful because she’s used real comments throughout that shows just how spiteful people can be and how they find it so easy to deliberately be hurtful. Em’s point on BBC News this morning is that just because it’s internet doesn’t make it less devastating to receive those comments.

There are internet sites entirely dedicated to being negative about vloggers and bloggers. It’s not really the comments that are shocking per se, but more the arrogance of the people who genuinely feel they have the right to make them. I’ve certainly had my share of negativity – according to them, I’m rude, arrogant, face like a dog, old, sour – I could go on… and it’s always a shock to read things like that about yourself (literally, it makes your stomach lurch). But they have far less impact than those who leave little drops of acid directly on my blog. Those who try and catch you out at every turn, who use words cleverly to knock your confidence and those who feel that it is absolutely their right to “bring you down a peg or two”.

In comparison to Em, I have nothing to complain about – nothing at all. We have a generation that doesn’t know life without the internet and we’re dealing with a sense of entitlement around judging others that is entirely new. In The Times today, there’s an article on being judged by prospective employers by how you appear on line. This is now absolutely normal, and yet, because the internet can make you fearless (you don’t actually have to front up to a real person), that lack of foresight or faux bravery could very easily affect your entire life going forward. It’s really not terribly difficult to track trolls and over time it will become easier. If trolls are absolutely determined to be anonymous, you have to weigh up the time it would take to track them vs deleting their comments and generally it’s easier to delete and get on with your life and leave them to their empty and bitter ones. I am constantly questioning what kind of person it is that is happier for making someone else unhappier.

Finally, why is more not being done to address the causes of acne and find treatments that actually work? Every single time you hear a dermatologist talk on the subject, there is no easy answer. Your skin is not your story, and yet, acne makes it so because it’s the first thing that anyone sees. There must be answers – there absolutely must be, and still it’s so far down the line for solutions. I understand that acne has serious competitors for cures – after all, it isn’t life threatening. But it is the difference between life fully lived and life half lived.

We will never stop unhappy people spreading their vitriol and anger at life across the internet. But we can do our own bit to redress the balance – for every negative, find a positive. Be the person that doesn’t judge others by their skin. Most importantly, watch Em’s video – she’s making people in their millions sit up and listen and if anything can create change, it’s that.

 


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12 responses to “Em Ford’s You Look Disgusting Video”

  1. Jane

    What dermatologists, pharma industry, organic brands recommend is all useless, it doesn’t work because it doesn’t take into consideration certain important things about skin. All of them do one thing right, but fail at another, so products do more harm than help. Most dermatologists have never had acne and learned about it from theory, which is just a theory. I have managed to fight my acne, it is a skin care system that I came to after 15 years of trying everything. I am surprised that no dermatologists so far came to the same idea. I hope one day to create my own skin care line, so that other people can stop worrying about acne too…Nonen should feel bad about their skin.

  2. Such a brave and beautiful women! Beauty comes from within it shines through in personality and is not skin deep as so many people seem to think – that just makes them very shallow. My daughter has suffered from acne since she hit puberty she is now 36 and still has it, recently diagnosed with poly-cystic ovaries she knows that it it an hormonal imbalance, but she is both beautiful outwardly and inside and no one can take that away from her. Trolls have nothing better to do, they are usually underachievers who find gratification in spreading their own misery to others, thankfully we can pity them for what they are and help others to ignore them as they thrive on other’s insecurities. Em is gutsy and her video is powerful, let’s hope more research and help becomes available, in the meantime she will continue to be a shining example of a strong and able advocate for others. I am so pleased you covered this Jane.

  3. Ali

    She is one of a number of young women with similar skin conditions I’ve seen on YT who put it out there. They give hope and help that outshines a million negative comments.

  4. Em

    As someone who was quite spotty as a teen, I love this video. I tried everything known to man to clear up my skin but that only seemed to make it worse. After a long time of ignoring my mum thinking I knew best (as you do), I followed her advice and cut my skincare routine right back to basics. It didn’t cure it but it definitely helped. I’ve since mostly grown out of it but have learnt how to deal with it in a way that’s best for my skin when I do get a few spots. I feel so sorry for people with adult acne because I remember how self conscious it made me. I was scared to be seen in public without make up and people mentioning it made me feel awful. I dreaded sleeping at friends’ houses because it might mean them seeing my bare skin. I wish people would stop and think and actually have a conscience…some people clearly just don’t care how their words affect others. Em x
    http://themusingsofem.blogspot.co.uk/

  5. Haflingerhannah

    Having watched this video all I want to do is give her a huge hug.
    I had cystic acne from my late teens to late 20s and ended up on Roaccutane under the care of the dermatologists. That helped clear the worst, but also made me seriously depressed and has left me with ongoing side effects over 5 years after stopping medication.
    I have acne scarring that usually gets hidden under makeup for work, and I feel self conscious to this day. It hugely affected my social life and confidence at sixth form, work and university – what you say about a life half lived rings so true.
    The Internet has many good things about it – shared knowledge / discovery etc… But I loathe the spineless keyboard warrior who thinks it’s acceptable to make themselves feel better by being unkind, mean, hurtful, spiteful and downright rude to others – especially those who put themselves out there to help others in their situation.
    Em Ford and Jane – I salute you, for being brave enough to put yourselves out there, for standing tall, for biting your tongue, for not giving up or giving in to the trolls. You are beautiful. Don’t let anyone tell you different xxx

  6. I fully agree with your comment of “It’s the difference between a life fully lived and a life half lived”. That is so true.

    I’ve had acne on and off for about 13 years now, it’s gone through all different types and varying degrees of severity. I’ve gone through everything from salicylic acid, benzoyl peroxide, antibiotics, the pill, roaccutane and laser treatments. None of which have ever been a permanent solution.

    After roacccutane and again a few years later after one of the birth control pills i managed to get a year or so of “good skin” on both occasions. After roacctune I’d say it was practically perfect! It changed who I was as a person, I felt like I was a full, complete version of myself.

    Acne takes away coincidence, it consumes so much of my day, and I feel it has limited my experiences. I try not to let it get in the way of my life but it does and I’d love more than ever just to be able to jump out of bed and head to work without a care for my skin. Having had those few years where I can see how much of a difference it made to my life I’m determined to get this under control once and for all!

  7. Minty

    I think she is beautiful inside & out. So very brave to make that stand too. Although my problem is rosacea instead of acne, I feel I understood her pain.

    My Mum always taught me that if you can’t say something nice to someone, then don’t say anything at all. I try to live by that- I don’t claim to be perfect but if more folk listened to my Mum’s wisdom the world might be a happier place.

  8. the40somethingbeautyaddict

    Nothing is being done because a lot of the beauty market is based on a cycle of cheap products that can only make the situation a lot worse! People are caught in a vicious circle of harmful products telling them they cure their skin issues while stripping their skin keeping the problem going! Big Bucks!

  9. I’ve had acne, and having read a lot about it, I think it is so hard to find the right approach because the causes are so complex. Hormones and genes may play a big part, and therefore it takes a dedicated and experienced doctor to tailor the right treatment to the individual. Such doctors tend to work privately and are therefore hugely expensive.I am not a dermatologist or a medical scientist, and I’m not saying that they do enough, but I do think there might not be a one-size-fits-all solution. I do think any problems to do with hormones (such as menopause) are not a priority in the state health systems, and they are not likely to be in the future, unfortunately.

  10. jennpeters

    I’ve had cystic acne since I was 14, I care less about what people think now that I’m 41 (hallelujah!) but it made my life hell as a younger person. I’ve been on every medication you can think of but they all eventually stop working because they are not treating the cause, only the symptom. I feel like the whole field of wacky hormones is not studied as much as it could be. They cause things like acne, PMS, depression, anxiety, so many things that affect our quality of life!

  11. Em’s video made me cry whilst watching it. I’m fortunate not to have suffered from bad acne, but I know how cruel people can be and have suffered from other peoples cruel words regarding my appearance. She is a very brave and beautiful lady and salute her for making this video xx

    kizzyhearts.blogspot.co.uk

  12. I suffered from adult acne, having never suffered as a teen, and it knocked my confidence massively. It was both comforting and annoying to find out from a doctor that there’s little you can do with diet and over the counter medications – luckily for me a course of antibiotics cleared it up. These trolls should realise that no one CHOOSES acne, it could happen to anyone and it’s distressing enough as it is without mean comments.

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