I’m kind of intrigued by the Rules For The Modern Gentleman App introduced by Dolce & Gabbana to mark their most recent male fragrance, The One Gentleman. It’s written by Dylan Jones, editor of GQ UK and if he doesn’t know how to get a chap out of a tight spot, then I really don’t know who would. The free App covers etiquette (yes, please…get out of that damn train set and give it to the ladies!), Style (can you imagine the world without socks and sandals? it’s got to be a better one, right?) and Grooming (bearing in mind that some fellas think that even deoderant is a care too far). 

That’s all very well, but it made me think about what free app I would create for men if I had the chance. Here’s my list:

The Electric Duvet App: gives a massive electric shock to any man duvet hogging. Massive. And particularly brutal in winter.

The Do Your Own Washing Up App: Loudly announces at random moments in the middle of the office that ‘You’re a lazy git and I’m packing to leave unless you get home and do YOUR washing up’. 

The Football-Fear App: Sends off waves of football phobia so they literally cannot watch it. Cannot. 

The Are There Any Clean Shirts App: A mind reading app that sends out a painful zap just at the point they’re about to ask about their shirts/pants/socks.

The Mother-in-Law App: A voice simulator that pops out little gems on a M-I-L visit, such as ‘Actually mum, I think Mrs BBB makes that cake a little more moist than you do’, or ‘Hmm, I like it better the way Mrs BBB flavours gravy.’ 

But back to Mr Jones, who no doubt never makes a faux-pas and probably does iron his own linen – or has an account at the dry cleaners more like. Rules For The Modern Gentleman covers everything a man might need to know such as how to tie a half Windsor knot (on his own, without referring to wife/girlfriend/mum and asking them to do it instead), or what occasions require formal cutlery (erm..)..down to really useful stuff like how not to have bad breath, which aftershave to choose and what day to put the bins out (no, not really!). Also covered are how to entertain friends, ask someone on a date or pick out an appropriate suit.

All in all, it’s not going to do any man any harm to brush up on etiquette, grooming or snappy dressing. Unless you are Mrs Jones, there’s always room for improving the other half, right? And, if you’re wondering what The One Gentleman smells like, it’s actually rather good – think a fusion of fresh grapefruit, pepper, and lavender, merged with middle notes of fennel and cardamom and down notes of patchouli and vanilla. I like lavender in men’s fragrances – it puts a slightly feminine element into the mix that’s really quite sexy. 

If you’re in the UK and want to buy some follow the link here: UK: http://www.boots.com/en/Dolce-Gabbana/Dolce-Gabbana-The-One-Gentleman/

If you’re in the US and want to buy some follow the link here: http://www1.bloomingdales.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=500515

And if you want to download the free app, do it here: http://itunes.apple.com/artist/dolce-gabbana-s-r-l/id317816262


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